Jun 17, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Untitled Read I recently had an assessment to get a second opinion on my autism diagnosis for paperwork purposes. My mom has also been pressing the doctors about getting me an ADHD diagnosis. The assessment...
Jun 17, 2026 from Chronicles of Miss Miseria [dVerse] June 16th - I was given eight crayons and drew a witness statement. The first box had eight colorsand no instructions for grief.Red was for apples, they said,as if blood had not already invented itself?Red is:the notification I still haven't opened,the lipstick I w...
Jun 17, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Espresso-No-No, Part 3 Read Espresso-No-No, Part 3 Customer: "A venti iced caramel macchiato, without the espresso." After explaining to him what exactly that meant. Customer: "I said what I said. I know what I want." Re...
Jun 17, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com All Signs Point To It Being A Crappy Morning Read All Signs Point To It Being A Crappy Morning Customer: "Your men's restroom is closed for cleaning!" Me: "Yes, sir. The cleaners work on those between 3 and 4 AM. They only work on one restroo...
Jun 17, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Calories Hate This One Weird Trick… Read Calories Hate This One Weird Trick… Customer: "Can I get [meal] but with the fried chicken, not the grilled. I'm on a diet." I think I did the Spock eyebrow raise, but I didn't say anything. M...
Jun 17, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Boss Level Entrance Read Boss Level Entrance Security: "Hey! You can’t do that! It’s a security risk!" Me: "Regardless of coming through the revolving door or this door, we still need to pass the security scanners and...
Jun 17, 2026 from Noahie's Blog Padromal Storms Can you believe we made it to another day? Can you? I took a late afternoon nap yesterday, and yet again I had a series of strangely vivid and metaphysically discombobulating dreams. The highlight ...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com This Payment Method Has A Checkered Past Read This Payment Method Has A Checkered Past Cashier: "We don't accept cheques. You can pay with a card or cash, Swiss francs or Euros." Customer: "But why isn't it marked somewhere?" Cashier: "We...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Looks Like You’re Shift Out Of Luck Read Looks Like You’re Shift Out Of Luck I work at the front desk. My shift ends at 6:00 PM. Another employee is scheduled to come in at 5:45 PM so we can do a handover. The problem is that wheneve...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com The Line Is Busy Read The Line Is Busy Customer: *On the phone.* "What?! How does that make sense! I would have said no!" Me: "Ma'am—" Customer: *To me.* "Hold on a minute! This call is important!" Me: "Oh, gee! In...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Red Flags Read Red Flags Me: "No, thank you, I'm not into tomatoes." Waiter: "It's not tomatoes, it's marinara." Me: "Uh, yeah. There's... tomato in marinara." Waiter: "There's no such thing as a marinara to...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com When Early Birds Go To The Dogs Read When Early Birds Go To The Dogs Early bird customers love watching me sweep or move things or whatever, not in uniform yet, clearly prepping, while walking into the restaurant. Me: "Ma'am, we ...
Jun 16, 2026 from Stranger Than Usual Kochbuch Nach langer Zeit habe ich endlich mal angefangen, meine Rezeptsammlung in Website-Form zu packen
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Excel-lent Consequences Read Excel-lent Consequences Now, she's absolutely lazy. Like, ridiculously so. Won't even get off her a** during lunch and go eat at the cafeteria. Instead, she makes a mess at her work desk (whic...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Pay By Rain Check Read Pay By Rain Check Customer: "Excuse me, you need to wipe down the patio tables! They're all wet!" Me: "That's because it's raining." Customer: "Exactly! You need to wipe away the rain!" Me: "B...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Trying To Get To Pole Position Read Trying To Get To Pole Position Customer: "Your stupid pole just damaged my car!" Me: "I'm sorry?" Customer: "I hit that pole on the corner leaving the drive-thru! I want my food for free, and ...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com A “Not Always Right” About A “Not Always Working” Read A “Not Always Right” About A “Not Always Working” Customer: "Let me tell you a little story, young lady. I'm cashing my late husband's pension, which I got after he died early of a heart attac...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com The Mouse Ate My Mortgage Payment Read The Mouse Ate My Mortgage Payment Caller: "Hey, so I'm calling to let you know I won't be paying my bills for a few months." Me: "May I ask why?" Caller: "I'm going on vacation." Read The Mous...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Ludicrous Parenting Read Ludicrous Parenting I grew up in the eighties and adored the movie Spaceballs. I'm now an adult and a parent. We're going on a long road trip, but luckily for my kids, our car has a DVD player...
Jun 16, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Appetite Fright Read Appetite Fright Friend: "Can we sit down and eat yet?" Me: *Finishing up in the kitchen and bringing out fruit.* "Well, it's not ready yet. It needs to simmer for the next hour." Friend: "I wa...
