Jul 10, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Untitled Read I work for a state agency (think environmental department) and I essentially regulate the amount of pollutants emitted by different businesses. My main focus is tracking specific businesses th...
Jul 10, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com The Butter Truth Read The Butter Truth Customer: "I need brown butter. It's for a recipe!" Me: "Ma'am, that's not sold, it's something you prep—" Customer: "—I didn't ask for your opinion. I want brown butter so I ...
Jul 10, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com The Dinosaur Who Cried Wolf Read The Dinosaur Who Cried Wolf Guest: "Why haven't they reintroduced the Newfoundland Wolf?" Me: "Well ma'am, they're extinct. They don't exist anymore." Guest: "Well, can't they bring them back?...
Jul 10, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Are Queue Serious? Read Are Queue Serious? The electronic gates at the airport show videos to the passengers of what to do. They show actors walking up to the gates, placing their passport down on the scanner, starin...
Jul 10, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com OSHAaaht Up! Read OSHAaaht Up! Project Manager: "Okay, I hear we have to do this OSHA thing? It seems like a waste of time, to be quite honest. I will talk to my line manager to see if this is necessary. If it'...
Jul 10, 2026 from is this it? July 2026 I’ve made some changes to a couple of photo albums on the website. southern-mountains features the same grainy black and white photographs from the South island taken in 2024, but I’ve re-edited th...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com There’s No Thinking Happening Outside This Box Read There’s No Thinking Happening Outside This Box Customer: "Wow, it must be cramped in there." Me: *Confused.* "What do you mean, ma'am?" Customer: "Inside the ATM. Must get cramped." Me: "Ma'am...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com A Double Take Read A Double Take Counter Lady: "Well, no need to ask about your relationship; you're clearly his dad." Awkward. I gently correct her. Me: "No, actually, I'm his brother." Read A Double Take
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com The Ups And Downs Of Retail Read The Ups And Downs Of Retail A customer approaches me at my counter. We're on the top floor of the department store. Customer: "How do I get back down?" I thought she was asking this because ou...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com I.D. Rather Not Read I.D. Rather Not Cashier: "Can I see some ID?" Customer: "Why?" Cashier: "Your card is asking me to." Customer: "What are you talking about?" Read I.D. Rather Not
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com This Is Why You Don’t Dine By Algorithm Read This Is Why You Don’t Dine By Algorithm Customer: "Oh, I don't like onion. Instead of the onion soup, could I get maybe chicken soup? Or tomato?" Me: "Ma'am, as I explained when I seated you, ...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Technical Debt Collectors Read Technical Debt Collectors Several months later, I was promoted and asked for a raise to go with my promotion. The CEO said no (all promotions and raises required CEO signoff). I tried negotiat...
Jul 09, 2026 from Thejesh GN SIR Online: Everything Is Difficult by Design I did SIR enumeration online. The application seems to have been written by someone who hates users and doesn’t want them to get the work done1. I have had the same EPIC number since 2002, and it i...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Cream, Sugar, And Sour Grapes Read Cream, Sugar, And Sour Grapes Customer: "What's going on out there?" Me: "It's the annual Pride parade today." Customer: "Oh my god. Why?! They're always so stupid." I choose not to engage and...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Sorry, Only One Cliché A Day, Please Read Sorry, Only One Cliché A Day, Please A guy brings a sealed internet router box into the store. Customer: "I bought this yesterday, and it doesn't work." Me: "Sir, you haven't even removed it f...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Exhaust-ing Hobby Read Exhaust-ing Hobby I worked an overnight security shift. There was a parking garage on site under the building I was posted at. One morning, while patrolling the garage, something drew my atten...
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com All Knowing Meets All No-ing Read All Knowing Meets All No-ing Customer: "I need a refund on this." Me: "That's not a brand that we sell. Customer: "I know I bought it here." Me: "You can't have bought it here, sir; we don't s...
Jul 09, 2026 from riz#000000me Hacks for D&D to Do Less Math D&D outside of combat is way too fiddly.
Jul 09, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Whoop, There It Is! Read Whoop, There It Is! Dad: "They sing 'Simple sister got whooping cough'. It sounds like something from the Chaucer era." Me: "I'm really not understanding how so?" Dad: "Like... people don't ge...
Jul 09, 2026 from riz#000000me Simpler Character Creation in D&D5.5e We have got to get away from the tyranny of numbers!
