Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Call My Bluff When I Call The Police Read Call My Bluff When I Call The Police Me: "Yeah, but there's more to our policy than just time. Products have to be in somewhat good condition for me to take them back." Customer: "Where? Where...
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Untitled Read Sometimes I have to call customers. Sometimes I get their voicemails. Here’s my favorite inbox message. (Sung to the tune of The Phantom of the Opera) Their name is (insert Na~me here). They’r...
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com A West Side Story Read A West Side Story Me: "No, I'm sorry, we only cover the west side of town. You wanna call our Elm Street location at 252—" Customer: "—Yeah, I thought that, but I live on the west end of the b...
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Untitled Read Ever since I was a kid, I’ve gotten nosebleeds. Most of the time I’m able to catch them before I start dripping blood everywhere, but one instance in particular haunts me every time I remember...
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Untitled Read My dad is over visiting as he often does. My kid gets frustrated over something. Kid: Jesus Christ! (My old-school Catholic dad is shocked.) Dad: Don’t say that! (He gives me the side-eye.) Me...
Mar 31, 2026 from Stranger Than Usual Skådis Ich möchte eigentlich keine Werbung machen, aber das Skådis-System von Ikea gefällt mir.
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com When E-Free Was A Thing Read When E-Free Was A Thing A younger guy, probably eighteen or nineteen, not a customer of ours, came in and asked if he could use the WiFi. I said sure, and he sat down for a few minutes, then s...
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Pizzas Are Cooked, Not Conjured Read Pizzas Are Cooked, Not Conjured Customer: "Yeah, I'd like one pizza delivered. Can I have that at 12:30?" Me: "Um...no. It'll be later than that." Customer: *Big, angry sigh.* "WHY?!" Me: "......
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com For Ink, Press X Read For Ink, Press X Customer: "My printer is out of ink. It says I need Magneto." Read For Ink, Press X
Mar 31, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Alliteration Stations! Read Alliteration Stations! One of my coworkers has been assigned to make announcements to the customers over the store speakers. She does not always stick to the script. Coworker: "Step right up f...
Mar 31, 2026 from Noahie's Blog Getting Slower There's been a certain gloominess I can't shake, but despite that, I feel calm. I don't know exactly where it's coming from. I'm not sure how well I'd be able to think my way out of it. It seems li...
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Free Period Isn’t Free Read Free Period Isn’t Free Me: "I'll need to set up an account for you. Do you have a school credit card?" Caller: "A credit card? Like what you buy things with?" Me: "Yes." Caller: "To buy... the...
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com A Signal Saga Read A Signal Saga Agent: "Hello, my name is Jason. Can I please have your name?" Me: *Gives name.* Agent: "Hello, my name is Jason. Can I please have your name?" Me: *Gives name again.* Read A Sig...
Mar 30, 2026 from Bobby Hiltz Teachers, you do not need those tools A plea to stop using the many online teaching tools like Kahoot! and switch to a more ethical alternative
Mar 30, 2026 from Bobby Hiltz Teachers, you do not need those tools A plea to stop using the many online teaching tools like Kahoot! and switch to a more ethical alternative
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Grassroots Crime Wave Read Grassroots Crime Wave Colleague: "Drive us to [Address] in [Village] for… uh… [uses the code for a stolen vehicle]. It just happened." Me: "If it just happened, why do you not sound very conce...
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com SELECT * FROM Disaster Read SELECT * FROM Disaster Out of nowhere, suddenly our servers started screaming at a pitch I don't ever want to hear again in my life. CPU usage spiked to 100%, and queries slowed down to zero. ...
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Overdressed And Underfunded Read Overdressed And Underfunded Me: "Your total is $22.30." Customer: "All I have is a $20." Me: "Did you want to take something off?" Customer: "Like… my clothes?" Read Overdressed And Underfunded
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Points Of Contention Read Points Of Contention Me: "I'm afraid that's not an active campaign anymore." Customer: "Well, you should let me use them today! Show some customer loyalty! I've been a frequent customer here f...
Mar 30, 2026 from Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com Better Late Than Felon Read Better Late Than Felon Facility Nurse: "But I had car trouble!" Me: "I understand, but I can’t let you in for this session." Facility Nurse: "It’s not my fault. Me: "I believe you; I’m not doi...
